Joni Mitchell's Blue and Why It's Timeless For Homesick Women Who Feel Too Much

or maybe we feel just enough

*I want to preface this piece by acknowledging Joni Mitchell’s weird obsession with black face. I in no way idolize her and that is not my intention with my writing. I separate the art from the artist. This piece is about the album itself and how I relate to the music.

So, I’ve been listening to this album. It’s sort of underground, sort of indie. Joni Mitchell’s Blue. You know, the one no one has ever heard of. In all seriousness, I have been listening to this album nonstop over the past two months. Back to back to back. And then out of order. And back to back again. I know I’m not saying something novel by proclaiming that this is a good album, or that it is one of the best ever made. I think Blue is so good because it is a product of its time and yet, simultaneously timeless. This album transcends generations of homesick women (all people but for my case and for the case of this blog, women) who feel too much.

Love Actually 2003.

In this piece I want to prove my statement by dissecting a few songs from the album. Some with a longer analysis than others (River and California I mean you). I appreciate you bearing with me!

All I Want

For an album called Blue, there are honestly a lot of upbeat melodies. The album opener All I Want is Mitchell’s plea for her lover to let things be fun, sweet and content—It’s all she wants.

I wanna belong to the living
Alive, alive, I wanna get up and jive
I wanna wreck my stockings in some jukebox dive

I wanna belong to the living. Mitchell wants to feel life existing inside and around herself. She doesn’t want to feel—well, blue. At this point in my life I am constantly trying to feel myself living because if I can make my brain remember the beauty of life, why would I need to be sad? I think many people my age may be able to relate to this. When most of our life is taken up by hoards of schoolwork, new and confusing relationships and leaving home behind, all we want to do is wreck our stockings in some jukebox dive. Or our fishnets in the club.

As I said earlier, this song is a plea from Joni to her lover. She is telling him all the things she desires out of their relationship.

All I really, really want our love to do
Is to bring out the best in me and in you too
All I really, really want our love to do
Is to bring out the best in me and in you

I wanna talk to you, I wanna shampoo you
I wanna renew you again and again

My favourite line is ‘I wanna shampoo you’. To me it is a naked line. Honest and vulnerable. Wanting to have sweet love, a fun love or a rewarding love seems universal. Before I got into my relationship with my wonderful boyfriend, I was kind of insane when it came to romance. I had these grand bucket list items I so badly wanted checked off by the most wrong for me people there could have been. I connect these lyrics to this time and not my current relationship because I don’t think these lyrics could apply to a relationship that really had all of the things. You really, really want but you don’t get. That’s why you write the song. I feel my point is backed up by the lines,

I am on a lonely road and I am traveling
Looking for the key to set me free
Oh, the jealousy, the greed is the unraveling
It's the unraveling and it undoes all the joy that could be

Despite the wishes Joni has for the relationship, her faith in it is wavering. Based on the things I’ve read on substack and the whisper quotes with Lana Del Rey as the background, a lot of young people find themselves stuck on somebody they know they shouldn’t be stuck on. It’s the bruise poking kind of love, ‘Then we both get so blue’. It’s the painful but sweet kind, you wanna keep digging your finger in for that moment of elation. They know it may not be the best for them and they want out because it isn’t living up to the idea they formed in their head but at the end of they day,

I wanna have fun, I wanna shine like the sun
Wanna be the one that you wanna see
I wanna knit you a sweater
Wanna write you a love letter
I wanna make you feel better
I wanna make you feel free
Wanna make you feel free
I wanna make you feel free

They stay wanting because things could be good. They could have fun.

Carey

Carey depicts Joni as someone far from home. She’s in an unfamiliar place and she discovers it to be wonderful but she still can’t help but miss her known surroundings.

Oh, you know it sure is hard to leave here, Carey
But it's really not my home
My fingernails are filthy
I got beach tar on my feet
And I miss my clean white linen
And my fancy French cologne

Many of us can relate to being in an unfamiliar place as we attend college or move away from home. We forge new relationships, find new hotspots to drink $6 matcha and get our fingernails dirty. Yet, some still receive a pang of guilt for what they’ve left behind. Our family, high school friendships and our memories. Despite what’s missed, there are always ways to keep one’s mind occupied. Wine and laughter with new friends is an excellent tactic.

Come on down to the Mermaid Café
And I will buy you a bottle of wine
And we'll laugh and toast to nothing
And smash our empty glasses down
Let's have a round for these freaks and these soldiers
A round for these friends of mine
Let's have another round for the bright red devil
Who keeps me in this tourist town

In A Case of You Mitchell writes; ‘I’m frightened by the devil/And I’m drawn to those ones that ain’t afraid’, to me the ‘bright red devil’ line could be a reference to Mitchell’s urge to live life on the edge. Perhaps that is why she stays in this town despite missing her luxuries and comfort back home. I feel the idea of ‘rebelling’ in our youth is inexplicably appealing. That’s what our twenties are for! We let the devil keep us out until dawn. We let the devil take over because when else can we if not now?

I said, oh, you're a mean old Daddy
But you're out of sight

The last chorus could be interpreted as Mitchell exclaiming that Carey is mean but a cool guy. Or that Carey is out of sight and out of her life, as she leaves for home.(Genius Annotation) Despite the fun we have, many of us will return home because like Mitchell, we know what we want and what’s best for us and that is to leave the tourist town. Except now we have these remarkable experiences that will help shape us as people we never would have gotten if we never left home.

California

Sitting in a park in Paris, France
Reading the news and it sure looks bad
They won't give peace a chance
That was just a dream some of us had

California opens with lyrics that put you right into the 1970s with Joni Mitchell. However, it made me think of the current state of politics especially in America and now Canada. I sit on a bench waiting for my bus and I read the news about members of the LGBTQ+ community losing personal rights. Women losing the rights to their bodies and freedom of choice. Much of the progress we made gone in what feels like a matter of minutes. Our chance at peace seems farther and farther from our grasp. Now just a fading dream. Sometimes if I think too much about it all I am reminded of how small and inconsequential I feel as a 19 year old girl living in a city just outside of a big city. What can I really do about any of it? I can voice my discomfort and concern, sign petitions and protest but will that really get us peace? And if it does, how long until we’re back at square one once again?

The rest of the song does not offer me such depressing introspection.

Oh, but California
California, I'm coming home
I'm going to see the folks I dig
I'll even kiss a Sunset pig
California, I'm coming home

Mitchell yearns for her idealized California. She misses it so much she’d even kiss a ‘Sunset pig’, a Californian police offer (Genius Annotation). When the sickness of wanting home reaches the point of hospitalization, you start to miss everything about it. All the things you know you detest, the things that aided in your decision to leave in the first place, become a part of the longing.

https://songmeanings.com/songs/view/61687/...

While the song praises much about California, I agree with this comment I found made 20 years ago by the way! 20 years ago oh my gosh. Seeing something on the internet from 20 years ago is horrifying. It’s me years old. Anyway, I agree that the song could be about anywhere. We want to go home and the see folks we dig. We just want to go home.

Oh, it gets so lonely
When you're walking
And the streets are full of strangers
All the news of home you read
Just gives you the blues
Just gives you the blues

I have found myself stricken with one of the worst cases of homesickness I have ever experienced while attending school. While Mitchell has enjoyable experiences—and i’ve had a few and I'm grateful for all I’ve learned—I’ve had a fairly bad time. A lot of it was personal issues but I just don’t enjoy who I am at school or the energy there. I am surrounded by millions of strangers on the train, subway and the sidewalks. No one I love is there with me and it gets really hard sometimes. I just haven’t felt like myself. Except for when I go home and I’m surrounded by ‘folks I dig’. My ‘California’ is my last year of high school with my best friends. Things weren’t so complicated, I was a decent weight (can I say this?), my home life was good (at least at the beginning of the year) but even when it wasn’t I had my cute outfits, distracting crushes and my wonderful friends to help me forget. And now, I have people and things to help but I’m in the thick of it. It’s like exposure therapy and there’s no escaping. I just want to go back to ‘California’. This is probably why I have been listening to this song at least 5-10 times a day—maybe more, certainly more than any other on the album. Or maybe just because it is very catchy.

River

Okay more homesickness and a sense of not belonging. I hope you can stand it once more. To me, River is about being sick of oneself as well as your surroundings.

It's coming on Christmas
They're cutting down trees
They're putting up reindeer
And singing songs of joy and peace
Oh, I wish I had a river I could skate away on

I was not in the Christmas spirit, I just couldn't be. Something in me wouldn’t turn on. my internal Christmas tree wouldn’t light up. Christmas music became monotonous and gave me headaches. The two songs I listened to most were Hard Candy Christmas by Dolly Parton and River. Hello seasonal depression. While it seems like everyone’s spirits are merry, I only want to escape somewhere with cool air where I can find solace in my surroundings. Escape the joy I can’t relate to.

But it don't snow here
It stays pretty green
I'm gonna make a lot of money
Then I'm gonna quit this crazy scene
I wish I had a river I could skate away on

These lyrics call back to homesickness. To me, Mitchell is expressing her distain for how different the winters are in California compared to Canada. How is she expected to be in the Christmas spirit if there’s no snow? How is she expected to be happy if she isn’t home?

I'm so hard to handle
I'm selfish and I'm sad
Now I've gone and lost the best baby
That I ever had
I wish I had a river I could skate away on

I’m sure many of us can relate to feeling like a nuisance to those around us. Possibly even our significant others. We can be a lot to deal with, letting our turbulent emotions get the best of us. They can make us needy and insecure. We’re constantly afraid our ever-present overthinking and over-feeling will drive good people away. Maybe it has. Now alone, we need a river to skate away on.

I wish I had a river so long
I would teach my feet to fly
Oh, I wish I had a river I could skate away on
I made my baby say goodbye

I touched on this already but I’d like to give more insight. There have been times where I am out in nature, walking in the park or on a sunny road, watching the water ripple at my city’s dirty beach or even watching lives roll by from an open car window, that I feel myself intricately linked to the world. The sun, wind, dirt, grass, lakes, moon and the stars share a special bond with me. I do not claim them as my own, I know I share them with every person but I enjoy knowing that I do get a part of them to myself. It’s like when I leave the movie theatre and I feel like my life has changed as I walk down the aisle. I feel like the main character of a great show who’s just had some wonderful character development. I guess it could be considered embarrassing. Though a lot of us seem to do it. It’s still lovely. It’s that feeling that I chase. The one I long for when life gets hard, when I’m not in the holiday spirit and I feel like my temperamental nature is forcing the people I miss most away; all I want is a long thick river to skate away on. When I breathe in the freezing air, I will finally feel alive. I will remember the greatness of the earth.

I don’t know if this feeling I over described is what Mitchell was intending to emulate in River. However, I think my interpretation could very well relate to others. And all art is up for personal interpretation, so I think it’s okay.

A Case of You

Just before our love got lost you said
"I am as constant as a northern star"
And I said, "Constantly in the darkness
Where's that at?
If you want me I'll be in the bar"

The amount of times a guy I liked has said some artsy supposedly poetic bullshit that isn’t even meant to impress me but impress themselves is kind of insane. The Genius Annotation explains that there is only one northern star, ‘THE Northern star'. Mitchell writes about it in This Flight Tonight, she is aware of the difference. I feel her response is in a way poking at that. She doesn’t give his ridiculous statement the thoughtfulness he probably wanted.

On the back of a cartoon coaster
In the blue TV screen light
I drew a map of Canada
Oh, Canada
With your face sketched on it twice

As we discussed in the California analysis, Joni Mitchell is Canadian, as is Leonard Cohen who the song is meant to be about. (I am also Canadian!!) While she shows love for California she seems to miss aspects of Canada. This we can see in River. How kismet for her to find a love from the same far away place as her. Her sense of home now bridged with him. ‘With your face sketched on it twice’. Home, a terribly personal part of herself now linked with her love.

Oh, you are in my blood like holy wine
You taste so bitter and so sweet
Oh, I could drink a case of you, darling
And I would still be on my feet
Oh, I would still be on my feet

The bond is unbreakable, he is a part of her. He’s sweet but bitter and she can’t get enough. ‘I could drink a case of you’ is on my top ten best lyrics of all time. A truly poignant metaphor I can never get out of my head.

I remember that time you told me, you said
"Love is touching souls"
Surely you touched mine
'Cause part of you pours out of me
In these lines from time to time

it’s a declaration of love but like the wine, it is the bittersweet kind. Who hasn’t been connected to someone wrong for us? It feels like a twin flame but to keep the fire going we have to give up too much of ourselves. I am a big fan of Sex and the City. I see a lot of Carrie and Mr. Big edits on TikTok. In the comments people say that they have found their own Mr. Big. ‘This love has found me’. First of all, I’m praying for you. Second of all, it seems to me that this addicting love comes back every generation. It adapts to the times; instead of love letters it’s liking your instagram story. Instead of exchanging mixtapes you get Spotify playlists with the most popular love songs of all time on them. Yet, we swoon. We would drink a case of them. There’s just something about them, isn’t there? We can hardly get enough. Which helps since we never get much.

I can’t express how grateful I am to you for reading this! If you read the whole thing, skipped through parts or even just skimmed it! I am so thankful! Have a wonderful day! I’ll write to you soon.

-

Em